Safe and Together

Shifting the paradigm where domestic violence, child maltreatment and child welfare meet

The language of child safety

Mar 10

Posted by David Mandel in Children Exposed to Batterer Behavior, Safe and Together Model

By Kristen Selleck, MSW

National Training and Consultation Director

Professionals who work in the domestic violence and child welfare fields use language that others outside these fields may find unusual. Terms such as fatality, safety planning, imminency, order of protection, and many others are common in our conversations but are not always common for others outside our professions. Although professionals in both fields use the same terms, the words may have slightly different meanings whether you’re working in child welfare or if you’re working in the domestic violence field.   This was apparent to me during a recent training I facilitated that was attended by domestic violence advocates and child welfare staff.

Safety planning, for example, in the domestic violence field is about planning with a battered woman based on her experience and needs with her input. Within a framework of “woman defined advocacy,” domestic violence advocates work with their clients to strengthen plans the client has already enacted and provide her with information to broaden her options. Domestic violence advocates safety plan with clients who choose to stay with the batterer and those who choose to leave. Its hallmark is the collaboration between the advocate and the survivor that prioritizes the adult survivor’s right to make her decisions and the centrality of the wisdom gleaned from her experience of the batterer and her situation.

For child welfare workers, safety planning means something significantly different. Child welfare workers regularly use the term “safety planning” to mean the process for developing a plan for keeping children safe from the risk factors in the home. A safety plan for child welfare often involves a parent agreeing to engage in steps to ensure child safety. These steps could involve attending substance abuse treatment, leaving the home, or to ensuring a child is safely sleeping without hazards. Child welfare safety plans may include language about domestic violence but this will rarely be the only item written down as a task or goal for a parent.   Even when domestic violence is included in a child welfare safety plan, it is singularly focused on creating conditions related to the safety of the child.

Because of this difference, along with the many other terms that both professional fields use with slightly different meaning, domestic violence advocates and child welfare workers can believe they’re on the same page when they are not. This can lead to confusion and tensions between the fields. In the training I recently facilitated, advocates and child welfare staff had an open discussion about the barriers to their communication, including differences in the meaning of terms. It was a frank and important discussion to address and move past these barriers to improve communication. Throughout the training, the participants worked at defining their terms and using the Safe and Together model as  a framework and common language for collaborative conversations focused on the safety and well-being of children and their mothers. It is useful for domestic violence advocates to articulate the importance of child safety to working towards safety and empowerment for domestic violence survivors. It would also be helpful for child welfare to work towards the safety of adults as part of their safety planning for children.

With such alignment around ending violence and keeping children safe, domestic violence advocates and child welfare workers should be natural allies. There are, however, tensions at times between the fields. By talking openly about these tensions and finding common ground and common purpose (at times through a mutually understood language), I believe that domestic violence and child welfare fields working together will only improve the outcomes for families. In areas where there is good partnership between advocates and child welfare, I have seen extraordinary collaborative efforts that have led to safe outcomes for children while they can remain in the care of the non-offending parent.  I am also excited to see efforts to improve collaboration in various locations throughout the country as I believe it will only lead to improved outcomes for battered women and their children. This can be accomplished in various ways, but it is an important step for advocates and child welfare alike to learn about each other’s positions, missions and the language each field uses to discuss the safety of children and their mothers.

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10 item checklist about the intersection of domestic violence, substance abuse and mental health issues

Mar 9

Posted by David Mandel in Children Exposed to Batterer Behavior, Safe and Together Model, Trauma Exposure Reaction

by David Mandel, MA, LPC

Domestic violence frequently co-occurs with mental health and substance abuse issues.   A batterer may be diagnosed correctly or inappropriately with mental health issues.  A domestic violence survivor may also have a substance abuse problem.  A child who has been exposed to batterer’s behaviors may have mental or behavioral health issues. Frequently our response to these issues are “siloed,” meaning we prioritize one over the other or even completely ignore one issue to focus on another.  For instance substance abuse and mental health counselors may not screen for domestic violence or if domestic violence perpetration  is identified as an issue it may seen as a symptom of the substance abuse.  A survivor’s recovery plan may be developed without consideration of how the perpetrator might try to sabotage her recovery.   Or a child’s behavioral health issues are not evaluated in the context of historic and current domestic violence.

The following is a 1o item checklist to help begin the conversation about the intersection of domestic violence, substance abuse and mental health issues.  I share this list with the idea that raising our awareness by asking questions about the connection between different issues can be huge step forward in our ability to help families.

  1. What is the relationship between domestic violence, substance abuse, mental health issues?
  2. How have the batterer’s behavior created or exacerbated mental health/behavioral health and/or substance abuse issues for the adult survivor and/or child?
  3. What is the relationship between the batterer’s abusive behavior and any of his mental health and/or substance abuse issues?
  4. How is the batterer interfering with/supporting the treatment and recovery of family members?
  5. How are family members more vulnerable to the batterer because of their mental health and/or substance abuse issues?
  6. How is child welfare and others assessing for domestic violence when the presenting issue is adult or child behavioral/mental health/ substance abuse?
  7. What are important case or treatment plan steps when domestic violence is co-occurring with substance abuse and/or mental health issues?
  8. What are skill level/policy/practices of substance abuse and mental service providers regarding assessing for domestic violence, safety planning and the integration of co-occurring issues into their treatment plan?
  9. What information do mental health and substance treatment providers have access to regarding the domestic violence?
  10. What is the training and skill level of mental health or substance abuse evaluators/assessors regarding domestic violence in general and more specifically regarding the co-occurrence of domestic violence with substance abuse and/or mental health issues?

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Daycare providers as an example of who else should be at our collaborative “table”

Jan 27

Posted by David Mandel in Safe and Together Model

By Kristen Selleck, MSW

National Training and Consultation Director

I recently facilitated a training attended by child welfare investigators, family preservation and other in-home service providers, domestic violence advocates, and day care providers who work with child welfare involved clients. The varied group of professionals in this training led me to think about the importance of including less conventional community partners in our domestic violence-child welfare collaborations.

Hearing the experiences and needs of daycare providers within this group led me to reflect upon the numerous professionals who have regular contact with children but are not regularly working with child welfare; these professionals can be allies in working toward the safety and well-being of children. Teachers, coaches, clergy members and religious educators, school administrators, doctors, nurses, daycare providers, therapists and counselors, bus drivers, guidance counselors, mentors, and others work with children on a daily basis; it is uncommon for many of these community partners to be involved in training together with child welfare staff to develop a shared language for the critical discussion about child safety and well-being. Vitally important in the day-to-day lives of children, these professionals provide and ensure children’s heath, routine, structure, social development, education or developmentally appropriate play. For a child exposed to a domestic violence perpetrator’s behavior, these things can assist a child in healing. However, in the child welfare and domestic violence fields, we rarely take the opportunity to collaborate with these other professionals who spend significant time with children on a regular basis.

Collaboration with others in children’s daily lives would require some cross training. Child welfare and domestic violence agencies could learn about the structure of different professionals’ capacities and obligations for their work with children. Additionally, child welfare and domestic violence professionals could educate these providers about indicators of exposure to domestic violence as well as ways to provide for the needs of children to have safety, stability and an opportunity to talk about their experiences.

In the recent training I facilitated, the presence of daycare providers working with child welfare involved children was beneficial to them and to the group as a whole. As the entire group learned about the Safe and Together model, the day care providers in the room were able to discuss with the group their observations about how children were impacted by domestic violence and begin to formulate ideas about how to improve their own responses to children; this information was useful to child welfare staff in thinking about how to gather information for their documentation about the children on their case loads.

As a result of this training, relationships were formed that hopefully will lead to improved collaboration, communication, and practice. By regularly communicating about the children (their needs, their behaviors, and their comments), child welfare and community providers can continue to monitor the behaviors of perpetrators of domestic violence as well as the impact of that battering on children. In addition, input from community providers can assist child welfare staff in learning about the strengths of non-offending parents through information about their actions to protect and provide for routine and stability for children. With more information, child welfare workers and management can make better educated decisions about their case plans and the needs of the children on their caseloads. This training opened my eyes about community partners I personally had not thought about engaging with through the Safe and Together model. Going forward in my work I know that I will be asking questions about the inclusion of child care providers and other unconventional partners in communities’ efforts to address the needs of families impacted by domestic violence perpetrators.

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Preventing disclosures of abuse and neglect

Jan 20

Posted by David Mandel in Safe and Together Model

By David Mandel

By now,  everyone is clear about  how damaging, counterproductive and dangerous it is when law enforcement officers tell a domestic violence violence survivor that any new reports of violence will lead to the arrest of both herself and her partner.  While this is not a sanctioned practiced, some domestic violence survivors report that this is what she was directly told or that it was implied through the interaction with law enforcement. For folks who aren’t clear about the downside to this practice:  it blames the survivor for the violence;  it adds, for the survivor, the threat of arrest and incarceration to the existing danger posed by the perpetrator; and makes the survivor more vulnerable because of the barrier it represents to help seeking.

There are parallels to this situation in child welfare. The following are similar actions:

  1. Asking a domestic violence survivor to sign a case plan that includes a condition of  “No further engagement in  violence in the home.”
  2. Workers directly stating or suggesting that if there is any more violence will summarily lead to more aggressive steps being taken, e.g. filing a petition or removal of a child.
  3. Not clarifying to a domestic violence survivor (and the perpetrator) the child welfare agency’s expectations and likely responses to new incidents of violence including the ways the agency could helpful and supportive to the survivor and her child if new violence was reported.

These actions, like those of law enforcement, can prevent disclosure of  new incidents of abuse and/or neglect;  increase the vulnerability of domestic violence survivors and their children; give perpetrators more power; decrease the flow of information on risk and safety factors to outsiders including child welfare; further isolate a survivor and her children from their support system; and ultimately impede the development of effective plans or timely interventions.

The interests of domestic violence survivors and child welfare are, in my opinion, highly consistent with one another.  Both the survivor and child welfare are interested in seeing the domestic violence stop and seeing the survivor’s child safe and well.  These common interests can form the basis of partnership and collaborative planning. And one of the principle steps to creating an effective partnership with the domestic violence survivor  removing barriers to that partnership while taking practice and policy positions that encourage collaboration.

A collaborative approach to domestic violence survivors is characterized by the following:

  1. Child welfare clearly explaining their approach to domestic violence issues to the survivor.  This approach starts with child welfare specifically articulating that it sees the perpetrator as responsible for causing the violence and being the source of the harm to the children. It is also includes stating that child welfare wants to partner with the survivor around the safety and well being of the children and intervene with the perpetrator to reduce is harmful impact on the family.
  2. Child welfare actively seeking to understand the domestic violence survivor’s strengths including the actions she takes on a daily basis to maintain her children’s  safety, stability and well being.  This includes understanding what she does to maintain their basic needs.
  3. The collaborative development of a safety plan for the children that fits with the perpetrator’s patterns, the survivor’s resources and can be documented by child welfare.
  4. Validation, by child welfare, of the survivor’s strengths (which does not preclude expressing concerns about the perpetrator’s danger to the survivor and the children or asking the survivor to agree to certain jointly identified steps to improve the safety and well being of the child.)
  5. Child welfare taking other active steps to be an ally and a support to the domestic violence survivor and her children.  This can include helping her with housing, other basic needs for herself and her children, helping overcome barriers to assistance and so on.

Domestic violence survivors are assessing outsiders through the lens:  “Are you going to make things better or worse for me and my children?  When child welfare takes the steps like the ones outlined above, they demonstrate to domestic violence survivors (and their advocates) that they understand her experience, that they won’t blame her for the perpetrator’s actions and that they will actively partner with her in practical, concrete and useful ways around the safety and well being of the children.   These steps can lead to more information about what is happening in the home and the development of more efficient, effective case plans.  This collaborative approach can ultimately pay huge dividends for child welfare and for families in the form of increased safety and well-being.

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Paying attention to worker safety in domestic violence cases

Jan 11

Posted by David Mandel in Safe and Together Model

by Kristen Selleck, MSW, National Training and Consultation Director

Successful child welfare interventions with families experiencing domestic violence depends on child welfare staff feeling confident, competent, and comfortable in working with situations where violence is a possibility. As part of our Safe and Together model we discuss safety concerns and safety measures taken by child welfare workers during the course of their daily tasks.

For example, worker safety needs to be considered when engaging and interviewing a perpetrator. The assessment of worker’s safety begins with seeking all available knowledge about the batterer’s specific tactics (his use of violence, threats and his potential actions towards escalation) and risk factors (possession of weapon, criminal record, past attempts or acts of aggression towards police or child welfare among others) prior to interviewing domestic violence perpetrators. While we know that the vast majority of domestic violence perpetrators will pose no physical harm towards child welfare workers, it is important to recognize that, despite this low occurrence of incidents, many workers have fear and worry at times when interviewing perpetrators of domestic violence. These fears can be about their own safety or fears that the intervention will trigger harm to the family members.

When I was a domestic violence victim advocate, clients spoke about their instinctive awareness of a batterer’s escalation. Numerous clients could identify key signals that their abuser was working himself up towards choosing to be violent. Battered women’s instincts were important to their ability to safety plan.  This is true for child welfare workers whose instincts are shaped and enhanced by their training, their supervision and their use of consultation.

I recently sat in on an interview of a domestic violence perpetrator by a child protective investigator in which the client was visibly agitated and fixated on the investigator’s ability (or lack thereof) to allow him to see his children despite the presence of a court order barring him from seeing his children. When the investigator appropriately explained her inability to change a judge’s order, the client became increasingly agitated and aggressive before finally stating that he wanted to harm someone. My instincts told me that the investigator and I were in physical danger and I repeatedly motioned to the investigator that we needed to end the interview. The investigator continued her interview until I stated that we had to leave. After we safely were out of the situation, I asked this investigator, for whom I have utmost respect, why she did not end the interview. She stated that she did not want her supervisor to be angry that she had not collected all of the information she was required to obtain.

Child welfare workers have incredibly difficult jobs with high levels of potential risk; much like firefighters walking into a burning building, child welfare workers walk into homes and situations that most people would turn away from. It is the job of a child welfare worker to go into volatile homes without armor, weaponry, badges or even hazardous duty pay. They face strict time frames and expectations of their duties and at times what falls by the wayside is their ability to take the time to trust their own instincts and walk away from a potentially dangerous situation.  While workers understand this risk and do their jobs despite it, it is important to recognize the tension between meeting the needs of a job and maintaining one’s safety.

It is important for child welfare supervisors, managers and consultants to allow for ongoing conversations about their workers’ anxieties and worries. These conversations will increase the likelihood that workers will use their instincts and make decisions based on those instincts rather than on a blanket anxiety that doesn’t account for the specific risk posed by any particular domestic violence perpetrator.

Here are some tips for workers and their supervisors to think about related to assessing worker safety related to going into homes with domestic violence:

  1. Worker should seek out information on related to the perpetrator’s dangerousness from multiple sources including criminal record, child welfare case records, and interviews with family members and collaterals.
  2. It is especially useful for workers to ask the domestic violence survivor how she believes the perpetrator will respond to the presence of child welfare.
  3. It is helpful for workers to understand the warning signs of high-risk or dangerous situations including perpetrators who have a history of assaultive and/or threatening behaviors to non-family members.  Especial attention should be paid to perpetrators who have history of assaultive and/or threatening behavior to law enforcement, child welfare and/or other authority figures.
  4. To actively seek out information regarding perpetrator access to or a history of weapon possession.
  5. Workers who are aware of potentially dangerous clients may feel more comfortable interviewing perpetrators in safe locations, such as courts, police departments or in the child welfare office.
  6. Child welfare staff should also have the opportunity to process their fears and concerns with their supervisors and learn about de-escalation tactics to assist them in their interviews with potentially dangerous domestic violence perpetrators.
  7. Cases involving high risk perpetrators can often benefit from being teamed with in a multi-disciplinary setting that includes law enforcement, child welfare and others.

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A brief overview of the Safe and Together model

Oct 29

Posted by David Mandel in Safe and Together Model

This short paper describes the Safe and Together model, the context for its importance,  select evaluation data and the standard elements of the Safe and Together training and technical assistance package for child welfare and its partners. To view click here.

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Domestic violence training for supervisors produces some positive results

Sep 29

Posted by David Mandel in Safe and Together Model

by David Mandel

“In child welfare cases involving domestic violence, supervision plays a critical role in determining the quality and consistency of case practice.   The expectations of supervisors and managers, as expressed through their questions and directives, determine workers’ priorities and areas of focus. Supervisors and managers make the critical decisions regarding case substantiation, transfer and removal.   In domestic violence cases,  it is the supervisor who decides whether a worker’s assessment of the domestic violence perpetrator’s threat to a child safety is complete. It is the supervisor who reviews the worker’s discussion with the survivor regarding safety planning and the children’s well-being.  It is the supervisor who often decides whether a case will be opened and transferred. And managers are frequently involved in cases, providing feedback and direction.” (excerpted from Supervising Domestic Violence Cases: A Training for Child Welfare Supervisors and Managers by David Mandel)

Starting in June 2008, I’ve been delivering targeted day long trainings for CT’s Department of Children and Families’ supervisors and managers entitled “Supervising Domestic Violence Cases.”   And as a follow up to the training,  I surveyed the participants regarding changes in their supervisory practice and their perception of the training is changing outcomes for families. The results are promising.

  • 66% of the respondents identified specific positive changes in their supervisory practice including (1) improved and increased utilization of the Domestic Violence Consultants; (2) greater understanding of the dynamics of coercive control and its impact on the family; (3) increased understanding of survivors’ strengths and safety planning; and (4) more specific questions and directives to workers.
  • 62% indicated positive change in their workers’ practice as a result of their training in the Safe and Together model including 1) workers were more empathetic and supportive to domestic violence survivors; 2) improved assessment and information gathering and 3) improved utilization of the Domestic Violence Consultants.
  • 50% of the respondents indicated positive changes in outcomes for families as a result of the training including 1) increased ability to maintain children safely in the home resulting in fewer out of home placements 2) referrals better tailored to the needs of the family 3) more support for domestic violence survivors and 4) greater accountability for the domestic violence perpetrator.
  • 69% of the respondents indicated continued positive or improved utilization of the Domestic Violence Consultants. For example, one supervisor reported an 80% increase in referrals to their Area Office Domestic Violence Consultant and other supervisors indicated workers were better prepared for the consultation process.

To read the full report on the training and the survey click here.


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David Mandel guest blogs for Hartford Courant Overcoming Battered Lives Series

Sep 1

Posted by David Mandel in Trauma Exposure Reaction

Tomorrow, September 2, I will be a guest blogger for the Hartford Courant Series Overcoming Battered Lives.  The focus of the blog post will be men and domestic violence.  I will be responding to comments on the blog all day.

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Batterer as fathers chapter published

Sep 1

Posted by David Mandel in Batterers as Fathers, Children Exposed to Batterer Behavior

by David Mandel

I recently had a chapter published on Batterers and the Lives of Their Children in the Praeger Perspectives 4 Volume Series “Violence Againt Women in Families and Relationships” edited by Evan Stark and Eve Buzawa.   My chapter appears in Volume Two “The Family Context” and focuses on the connections between batterer’s behavior and children from conception through adulthood.  I also engage issues related to the desire of many battered women for their children to have safe contact with their fathers, the double standard we apply to mother and father’s behaviors and the importance of setting high expectations of change for batterers as fathers.

The entire series offers a comprehensive overview of  the issue of violence against women in families and relationships. The volumes cover victimization and the community response, the family context, the criminal justice system and the law, and the media and cultural attitudes.   The series includes chapters by Evan Stark on the Battered Mothers’ Dillemma,  Joan S. Meier on the Misuse of Parental Alienation Syndrome in Custody Suits,  Leigh Goodmark on Battered Women who Fight Back Againt their Abusers,  Claire M. Renzetti on Intimate Partner Violence and Economic Disadvantage and Janice Ristock on Understanding Violence  in Lesbian Relationships.   Other chapters are by well known scholars and practitioners like Andrew Klein, Eve Buzawa, and Marianne Hester.  The series is a tremendous resource for students, practitioners and academics. I hope you check it out. (Fair warning: The entire series is on sale new for $400 for the four volumes.  If you decide not to purchase it, please recommend it to your local academic institution or library for their collection.)

The series is on sale at Amazon and through the publisher.

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Overcoming Battered Lives

Aug 25

Posted by David Mandel in Trauma Exposure Reaction

The Hartford Courant recently started an on-going series of articles on domestic violence. Their in-depth look at  domestic violence in CT can be accessed here.  As part of this series, Kristen Selleck,  one of the DCF domestic violence consultants trained in the Safe and Together model and a trainer for David Mandel & Associates LLC, is a guest blogger.  Check her blog entries and the other blog postings that are part of this series here.

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